When you think of a Zambian man what is the first thing that crosses your mind? My guess is that you have two perspectives characterised by the following features; a philandering, heavy alcohol consumer with a disregard for fitness. Secondly, an ambitious well balanced gentleman with a proper understanding of his role as a man. Perhaps am overreaching but it seems to me that the former is a much prevalent variety despite the complexities he might possess inside his beer belly. So why is this the case? Are we allowing boys to grow into uncertain animals with no idea of what their role in society is? How did we reach such a place and what can we do about this?
Noticeably, we are living in an age where society is extremely sensitive about offensive behaviours and remarks. Because we are living in a time more peaceful than any generation has ever experienced a lot of time has been freed up for social observations and discussions aimed at keeping and making sure that everything is nice and tidy as far as propriety is concerned. That is why we have feminist movements, gay rights activists and more. These advocacies are very progressive and necessary additions to the cultural landscape and on most occasion fight for noble causes. However, I think we need to relax on some of the unfounded man bashing. The idea of intimidating heterosexual men to the point of submission causes a malaise that characterises young men with confusion and psychological trauma. All this bashing is harming the heterosexual male. We need to save him!
Therefore, what we need is a group of men’s rights activists. And what I am advocating is not the current craze of keeping beards, wearing suits and driving big cars as a show of masculinity. These visual displays are meaningless in an economy that has made the production of clothing, media devises and the access of loans easier than it has ever has been. So no instagram men talk here. What we need is lessons for real men on the characteristics they must pursue. I know that because we are living in the most peaceful time man has ever experienced it seems unnecessary to reach for such an end. But if you look in the paper and see how most crimes and despicable acts are performed by men you know we need this more than ever.
I have found myself squandering money on silly pursuits, clubbing more than I should be and being a subpar boyfriend (in the past) and in those silent moments alone an itch develops and one wonders, why bro? And in my search it seems one of the causes is this issue we are faced with! No one gave me a handbook on being a man! So now before it’s too late my aim is it to curate a reservoir of lessons I can use for myself with the ultimate aim of passing it on to the youngsters. Who is with me?
Some of the benefits that will accrue as a result of a refocus onto the male include an increase in honesty, less heartbreak, more money in everybody’s pockets and much more. Join me every Man-day as we try to explore how we can become better men, better fathers and essentially better people. Everybody is invited to contribute on how the male species can be saved! “Save the heterosexual, save the world”.
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